I apologise for the very narcissistic photo, but this photo showed me something important that I would like to share.
I don’t like my image in the mirror, I am glad to have a healthy, functional, slim body that sometimes I receive complements for. But when I look at myself in the mirror, I can only see that I am getting old, I look tired, I have constant dark circles under my eyes, I don’t like my smile, I don’t like my shape and I can find a criticism for every inch of my body, but above all, I don’t like myself in photos.
But that photo I liked, I can still criticise it, but I liked it, and when I said that to my partner, he came to me and said “I am glad you can see what I see”. That photo was taken by him, the majority of photos you will see of me, were taken by him, a financial guy that doesn’t know anything about photography, but when he looks at me, he sees beauty.
In our very image-oriented world, it is easy to get lost in looks, it is easy to try to portrait an image of yourself that you are not, just because you believe this is how you are supposed to be.
People will see you with their lenses, independently of how you dress or how much you fake it. We all have lenses, pre-existing believes and judgments, sometimes we create the image of a person without even knowing them, and we think we can create this image of ourselves to the world, but we cannot.
Unfortunately, I care a lot about the opinion of others, I am afraid of being judged, of not being pretty enough, smart enough, calm enough. Well the reality is that I will never fulfil the expectations of everyone, and I should not have to worry about it.
I am working on my self-acceptance, I am working on not letting criticism affect me emotionally, use the potential constructive content, but this is just the opinion of one person, and I am working on trying to see myself through the eyes of those who love me, and who can see beauty and love on my messy face when I wake up.
Be who you are, be kind to all living beings, do your best, and try to continuously work in finding your true self.
ad little text about Ju